Probably the best way to get a clear idea of how your ex feels about … He asked me if I would give him the opportunity to say them to me. Nena. So, just get over it... just because an ex contacts you to say hello after 30 years does not mean that he wants you back. 70,691 70.7K. Before you contact your ex, you need to have a general idea of where their head is at. He fired back with a litany of messages, which began with profanity and culminated in pleas. I’m slowly coming to the conclusion that it’s a waste of time. Category 1 - You loved him, he loved you. Every relationship ends differently and there is no strict rulebook to follow when it comes to dealing with an ex contacting you years later. Let your ex know. He was a very controlling person who was jealous all the time. The 3 D’s of getting contacted by an ex. I’m Sorry for What Happened. He was my crush. I have been divorced for 15 years … They are suffering too, of course they are. He is married and I just got out of a 19 year marriage. After 2 1/2 years of NC My Ex Contacted Me ***Shocked Silent**** I can't believe I am writing this thread. If your ex and you had a very on and off and then on-again kind of a relationship, do you think bringing that back into your life is a healthy decision? But just one week later, her ex started texting her again as if everything was totally normal between them. Days later I was plagued with my emotions because I missed those times with my ex boyfriend, the fun we had together, the love we shared then, etc. Do you still think about them? Be a part of Bonobology for free and get access to marvelous stories and information. Think of yourself first. Also, I need to emphasize that an ex-boyfriend who really cares about you and genuinely wants to get back together… Is willing to take baby steps towards working out your relationship problems and make a consistent effort in doing so. You should be at least somewhat confident that whatever you say to them is going to be well-received. Getting an outside opinion from someone who has more experience than you, is nothing short of maintaining the blissful life you have been having. Ex girlfriend contacts me after 10 years. Needless to say, the breakup leaves you heartbroken and devastated. by Frankie Cola When your ex girlfriend reaches out after a long time of no contact, the emotions come back, old passions flare, and your brain starts spinning around wondering what the heck you should do. Three words: Manage your expectation. I thought really hard about this and have come up with really only six reasons for why an ex boyfriend would want to contact you if he has a new girlfriend, He has grass is greener syndrome. We like each other but both understand it would never work. Whether you keep contact or not is up to you but if you do, don’t do so with the false hope that the reason he made contact was because he wants you back. we're both married... Ex girlfriend contacts me after 10 years. We saw each other and are still attracted to each other so I thought why not. Our relationship was intense but yet very uneven. So … You may feel an urgency to respond right away, but slowing down can make sure that you're happy with your response to your ex and that you are actually ready to handle speaking with them. If you are surprised by the contact, but remain more curious than jittery, the contact really is out of the blue. “Best of Elite Daily” stream in the Bustle App. Wasn’t at all a happy story like yours. He called me and texted … Based on these statistics, you will also likely hear from your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend in the first 6 months. She has her problems as I do too. I am sure I still look like a dear in head lights, wide eyed and shocked. Before you contact your ex, you need to have a general idea of where their head is at. romantic: why ask? If it is not the case, below are reasons why she is contacting you several weeks or months after the two of you broke up. Add message | Report | See all. You have to weigh up what the worse case scenario is and if you … Although I will admit that we both have the odd what if moment. Initially, he said he’d make more of an effort, but a week later, he said it wasn’t working for him. If you have seen this behavior before from your ex, don’t dive in headfirst. Your obligation towards your ex has ended and it is alright to think of yourself first. 1 … The more you fear your ex, the more power you end up giving to him or her. And if everything else fails, go with your gut feeling when an ex contacts you suddenly. Ex girlfriend contacts me after 10 years. But if you guys ended mutually but have somehow not kept in touch for these years, having a quick convo over Instagram is not a bad idea. Now married, I have been with my husband 6 years. Ex girlfriend contacts me after 10 years. If this isn’t the most obvious reason, I’m not sure what is. We will talk about that in greater detail later on. Today after 20 years, she is married with four kids and I married with three kids, I still have feelings for her. Think of your life right now. … Being in contact with an ex. She feels something compelling her to call you but she doesn’t know what it is and why it is persuading her to contact you. When an ex contacts you years later, you need to focus on why he or she is your ex first. … Ex boyfriend/girlfriend contacting you when you have moved past them are the biggest pain in the ass. Don’t overindulge. Interested In Reconnecting With An Ex After A Breakup? 70,691 70.7K. Making your ex feel bad is also a big no-no. I was so devastated that I left the country to try to get over her. She didn't contact me until 5 months of me giving 'space' then I suddenly got a letter through the post because she didn't have the bravery to face me - even though we had a 3.5 year relationship together. I was 20 when i met my ex bf and we were together for nearly 4 years. You need to be wary when your ex makes impulsive declarations of never-ending love. Don’t rush into setting a date for a catch up over coffee. natsmum100 Sat 12-Jan-13 11:58:14. 1. Your ex hasn’t been waiting for your apology all these years as your ex isn’t dependent on it. If we take into consideration only the first 12 months, a total of 86 dumpers broke no contact and contacted their exes after 7.16 months on average. And the more power you give, the harder the time you will have when you hear from your ex. Also, a Caffeine headed individual whose day consists of bouts of contemplation about life and afterlife. ghosted you and has re-surfaced for closure, He Left Me For Another Girl And Now He Wants Me Back, eight reasons why you should block your ex right then, 5 shocking rebound relationship stories you must read, 15 Clever Ways to Turn Down An Ex Who Wants To Be Friends. Make sure you remain honest if you decide to speak. Do you like how your life looks without your ex? When an ex suddenly gets in touch with you out of the blue, it can be a confusing and frustrating situation. 10 Answers. 1. He was the boyfriend I loved for three years until I met my dear husband whom I have been married to for 29 years. Find Out When Breaking The No Contact Rule Is Finally Okay — And When You Should Stick To Keeping The Past In The Past. Country to try to get together just one week later, her ex started texting her again as if else. Get over her he is a changed man that we were together for 4... 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